Who Are You Calling?

I drew this picture a while ago, I guess it was kind of a reflection, not of what I necessarily  was. But rather a visual interpretation of what I should be doing.

It's a picture of someone calling out with all they have to another. Reaching to them from a higher place to pull them from their situation.

It's something I believe we all have been called to do-Call. Not just from a stage, pulpit, a TV screen or even a blog! But rather there are people in our lives everyday dying to be called to, looking for a hand to pull them back from the brink.

I know if the people God put in my life to call to me, when I was at the edge, hadn't, I would be a very different person.

So who are you calling to? Who are you reaching for? I promise someone needs you to.

Maybe you're not calling at all, and you need to realize that you are the one who was put in a specific someones life to reach and call out to them.

Or maybe you have been calling to someone for years and they just don't see to hear you, I implore you to keep calling, they will listen in time.

Or maybe you're the one who needs calling out to, the one who needs to be brought back from the brink-If this is you, then please open up your eyes to the people already calling to you, I promise they're there.

So whoever you are-Mother, father, sister, brother, friend, pastor, movie star, or just a person. There is someone in your life who needs you to start or to call  out to them, to reach in to their situation and help them out. Who are you calling?

-Nathan

Wisdom Chasers. How a young man caught a glimpse of God in his youth.

I was faced with a decision when I was 19. Let me explain. I had moved out and was living in the Big City (New York) on my own. I remember it was a cold and rainy night, my family had left to go back to Colorado and there I was, little old (well actually very, very young) me. I had no idea what I was doing and I was all alone. But there, on my first night out on my own, as I was sitting on my Ikea bed in my small apartment bedroom in Harlem (Yes... I know the family wasn't thrilled, but I was poor), I heard a voice. It was God, He said "Chase me!" and suddenly He ran out the door and into the pouring rain. I yelled after him that I was cold and alone and was kinda tired, but He just kept running.

So there I was, faced with a bigger decision than I could ever imagine. Chase after God, or do what I feel like. Well I chased God, I chased him right into the pouring rain-where I danced and sang with the Creator of the universe. I chased him through the next year of ups and downs, friends and heart-break, hurts and joys. I chased him right out to Hollywood California, where today I'm finally able to look back at all the chasing of God and say with complete honesty... It has made all the difference.

These are a collection of thoughts and the glimpses of Gods wisdom I had to chase down. All compiled into my very first book. I would love for you to become a Wisdom Chaser too. Click to get your very own copy. Thank you so much.

Off to chase!

-Nathan

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Rocking out

Right now I am rocking out. I have my ear phones on at work. I have the music I love turned up to the max-And as the moving sounds of heavy beats and soothing melodies invade my ears, they begin finding their way to my soul, causing a visceral reaction in my body. I am now moving back and fourth, fading in and out of playing air instruments, and something that vaguely resembles break dancing. I am getting subtle looks from my coworkers indicating how crazy I look. But to be honest I don’t care, I am feeling something very strongly and feel the need to be affected by it.

Later, I will get into my car and as I drive home, I will turn my music up as loud as possible. I will let myself become immersed in it-in the words, the melody, the feeling and the emotion of the song. It will take over my inhibitions and I will tap my fingers and hands on the makeshift drum set of my steering wheel. I will play my air guitar using my seat belt as my frets. I will sing as loud as I can while moving left and right to this . As I do this people on my left and right, are either laughing or looking on in confused wonderment. They can’t hear the music I hear, so they can not feel what I am feeling. But what they can see is the effect the music is having on me as a whole, and I wonder if maybe just one or two of the thousands of drivers I am passing wish to hear what I am hearing so maybe they could share in the moment I am so clearly enjoying.

Jesus came and sang us a song; a beautiful, infectious, life changing song. We have the chance to not only hear it but, to let it take hold of us. It’s a song that will change you and heal you. It’s a song that only those who know him will be able to hear. You will look ridiculous as you begin to rock out to the song he sang to us, but as you do people will see how this perfect piece of music effects every area of your lives, many people will think you’re crazy, but some after seeing you rock out to it this song, will want to hear it too.

So let the song He sung to us affect you and every part of your life, so others will see and want to hear the song we get to rock out to...Too.

And if you haven’t heard the song message me, I’ll send you the Mp3.

When all we have is our head in our hands...

Do you have those times, when nothing is right and the only place to go is in your hands? Well, the answer is yes, we all do. We all have those times.

Sometimes, we fight God, we wrestle and push against his gentle hands. We think we know best and we find our selves hurting, or alone.

And sometimes, life just decides beat up on us, it kick us while were down, we get betrayed and our dreams fall apart.

But the light in all of this, is, God is there, ready to catch us. Not because of anything we can do to earn it, or because we are good enough to receive it. But simply because He can and He loves us.

So below is a song I wrote when I felt like my world was falling apart and there was nothing I could do to fix it. I didn't deserve help, but at the same time I felt his loving hand reach into my mess and put me back together.

Fight You

When all that I have is my head in my hands, But all that I want is your hands on my heart. Be near, be here When everything else in my world falls apart, And grace is just the tourniquet from which I'm to far. Please, find me.

Oh, how I fight you. But Oh, how you love me.

When everyone else in my world walks away, And I can't seem to see your light leading my way. Burn bright, in my night. I feel im going at this all on my own, Let the fire you once lit inside me be shown. Burn all, of my pride.

Oh, how I fight you. But Oh, how you love me.

When I forget how to trust start fighting your hand, You hold me even closer and whisper your plan. In my ear, make me hear. When all my mistakes leave me broken and marred, And love is your autograph burned on my heart. In blood, your precious love.

To listen to the song click here

What To Do With A Spotlight

I have a confession to make...I watched an awards show, the VMA's.... Yes, yes I know unforgivable! But in my defense first-it was a rerun and second-there is absolutely nothing good to watch on any of the 14,990,837 TV channels  at 11:00 o'clock at night-ALSO because of the nature of living in Hollywood it has been impossible NOT to hear the whirlwind of sound bites repeatedly and violently being shoved in my ears about EVERYTHING that happens in this crazy place. But In the midst of this avalanche of often unwanted information I usually tune out-I kept hearing a story that peaked my interest. It was of someone by the name of Justin being ridiculed for thanking Jesus. Hmmm.

So that's how I ended up in-front of the TV at close to the middle of the night, watching a rerun of a show that has seemed to do nothing but build the ego's of already pompous people and tear down good values in a fun and entertaining way. YAY! I watched as the first number began. Someone our geniration has come to know all to well took the stage, Lady Gaga. I watched, as honestly, she gave the performance of a lifetime. It was surprising, dynamic and as much as I hate to admit it, stunning. The performance to be quite honest was amazing, the performance being given by someone who actually regularly tells her concert goers to confess with their mouths that Satan is with us....wow....

As a Jesus guy myself, this is not my cup of, well-really anything. Aside from being a bit freaky, I so suddenly wished there was someone as talented and influential singing the RIGHT messages as loud as she is presenting the wrong ones (Keep reading you wont be disappointed).

I continued watching the spectacle. The night raced on with more lights, costumes and fan-pleasing performances by Kanye West and J-Z. Awards being given out by the most famous and important people, and then even more flashy and eye-catching performances from everybody from Beyoncé to a homage to Brittney Spears. As the loud, bright, and flashy continued, I steadily grew weary and increasingly sad. Sad at all of the glorification of blatant rebellion and lack of morals. I picked up the remote to turn off this depressing world to close my eyes, when something stopped me and kept me from giving up on pop culture as a whole.

There in the midst of all the noise, something really amazing happened. Kim Kardashian walked onto the stage and announced the winner for Best Male Video. Sixteen-year-old Justin Beiber stood up to accept the award. He, in his hip glasses and bright red pants, riding much too low for a reputable young man (close to mine when I was a 17-year-old boy), walks (not runs) to the stage. As he accepts the award, he turns to the crowd of self-important people, seemingly influential figures, controversial performers, rich big wigs, stars and names known all around the world, & as they all quiet down this young man steps to the mic, and says this,

"I just want to say thank you so much, not only to God but to Jesus, Because I wouldn't be here without him. He's really blessed me. He's put me in this position. So I want to say thank you so much.

Also, I want to say thank you to all the other nominees, They were amazing. I'm a true fan of all of them, so I want to share this award with all them. You guys are amazing."

Then, he walked off the stage. I sat back amazed. I don't know about you, but I thought this was beautiful. In this a sea of self-love I was watching amidst all the "I'd like to thank my agent's" and impersonal shout-outs to God, comes a young, fresh-faced, inexperienced, boy, who with the short time he is given on stage, recognizes, not just the undefined name of "God" but rather, he specifically gives Jesus the credit.

First, what a very brave thing to do. I can't imagine the kind of pressure to do and say things a certain way especially when you're young and fame and things of this world are so appealingly displayed.

Second-I don't know much about this young man. I know he is a flawed human who has made mistakes, but I think honestly it's amazing and inspiring that, in the middle of all that darkness, someone was willing to speak out in the arena that God had given him in the midst of unbelievable pressure, to give Jesus the credit.

Unfortunately, I was alone in my thinking. The day, after joke after joke, comment after comment, and jab after jab, spilled over the media outlets about how dumb this kid was because of a grammatical error. That would be enough to make me want to give up all together. And I don't know how it will be handled by him. But I think that this young man will be blessed by God in someway, because Jesus once said,

"Everyone who acknowledges me publicly here on earth, I will also acknowledge before my Father in heaven."

Matthew 10:32 NLT

Jesus blesses and uses those who recognize him. That is the point of this. Jesus doesn't bless and use us because we never make mistakes, or have perfect grammar (I would actually never be blessed if this were true, so I'm with you Justin if you reading this). But he just loves it simply when we turn everything we have back to him.

So this has inspired me to begin to recognize Jesus wherever God has put me, whether it's in the office, behind a computer or in front of a huge crowd. I figure if a 17-year-old heart-throb can do it in front of millions of people, I can do it to the arena God has given me. So here goes.

I give all the credit for everything I have been given, my amazing family, my incredible girlfriend, any kind of platform I have, and anything I will become to Jesus.

I hope that this might inspire you to recognize Jesus in the arena He has given you, whether it's a house and family, or a world stage, He WILL bless us when we look and point to Him.

To watch clip click here

To encourage this young man of faith click here

The Earth Shakes, The Hills Are On Fire. And It Is Still All Going To Be Okay.

I drove into Los Angeles exactly two years ago on this day. I remember there was fire leading my way, billows of smoke ushered me in. The feeling of the city was the same that echoed my life-It was the aroma of unrest and uncertainty. It seemed that very little was under control and as the fires burned OUT of control in my life and the hills of California-God WAS in control.

Two years later I sit here reflecting on what an amazing path God has led me on. And no it was not an easy one and I have my fair share of fires, ups and downs and uncertainty. To be honest I still have little under control. BUT I am beginning to learn He does.

So as I sit here writing this, Remembering the past two years. I should tell you what just happened-The earth shook, or quaked rather. And as I was sitting there at my desk (five minuets ago), A few things followed.

First, three people shouted "Earthquake" which despite being a very obvious observation helped me slower than I'd like to admit, come to the realisation that I was in the center of an earthquake. While the ground was still shaking I began to text loved ones. Then last but not least I started having a deep thought about life and God. All of this while people were yelling something at me. I still don't know what they said, but I'll get under a doorway in a second, first I would like to tell you what occurred to me.

I think one of the things that stuck me most (aside from my water bottle) was THE EARTH IS SHAKING.Tthat's amazing and very unsettling when you think about it, to have the very earth we stand on shake, brings up such feelings of unease and discomfort. But at the same time I am reminded that God is bigger!

The bible talks about when God setting the pillars of the earth with his mighty hands, and fire coming from heaven to welcome God's presence. That's amazing to think about to me.  That even in the entire city of Los Angeles could be shaking, yet it was God who set the pillars of the earth we live on in the first place. It reminds me that our hope is not in this earth not shaking, or the hills not burning. But rather our hope should be placed in God being in control OF the earth that is shaking, and the fires raging.

I find in my life, even when the earth isn't shaking or the city burning. My world very often looks and feels as if it is falling apart. Wether it's the disappointment of rejection, the fear of an unknown future, the uncertainty of love or your next pay check, the bitter sting of betrayal from a close friend, or maybe just loneliness. I think all of our worlds from time to time fall apart, all of our lives have natural disasters. That no matter how hard we try to control or fix, we can't.

But the amazing thing is our hope is not in a world that is falling apart but a God who holds us together. We have someone to look to that is so much bigger than our strength or any others we can rely on. We have a God while not always letting us know every detail of what's going on or what's going to happen, cares about us and is strong enough to hold us together and know help us through anything that may arise in our lives.

He can put broken families back together, heal hurt relationships, teach us to forgive what we never thought we could get past, and open doors we never thought we could break down.

So as I leave you and go run for cover remember this.

God loves, wants to lead you, you and is much much bigger and stronger than you can ever know. And everything actually WILL be okay.

Special is a good thing. Also very cliche, but good.

Your children, your friends, your coworkers even your family are all different. Just like me. VERY different. You might not know this, but I promise if you look behind you at your beautiful children playing on the floor you will see it.

Here look, I’ll show you

Child Number 1: Is building a well thought-out and smartly designed layout of New York with the blocks and foam rings you have so graciously provided for your kids. He is quiet and methodical, and you can see his little hands carefully putting each of the plastic toys in their well thought out place, one step closer to completing his masterpiece.

Child Number 2: Has just put a ring and  brick together named it baby Abby and now she is feeding the blocks with a stick that has seemed to turn into sustenance. In her little eyes you can see the caring as she gently takes care of and with gentle hands provides and cares for this imaginary creature, that she genuinely believes to be alive and need caring for.

Child Number 3: (me) Is throwing the blocks at child Number 1 and child Number 2. Oh, and is now come up with a war cry that involves the words “kill” and “lunch time” and has begun throwing the toys you so so graciously gave to him use constructively……At you.

Guess what…. This is beautiful. They all, are completely different, and all of them, are exactly who they are supposed to be. But unfortunately this is not what they will hear as they go from class to class and peer-to-peer. They will hear that they are not fitting in the right way. They’re not learning in they style they should. They will feel stupid when; they can’t spell chrysanthemum, or know how to find X and the square root or 67,910,998,189. I remember thinking that somehow there was something wrong with me, when my friends would talk about calculus after class, because to be honest I didn’t know if they we speaking in a unknown language, or maybe they had joined a cult that used insanely baffling sounding equations to confuse and destroy the ones like me.

But what I wasn’t told by this world/school/all of my peers, is that I wasn’t made to do math, or be a good speller. Not that those things are bad, and honestly the people who ARE good at them amaze me. But that’s not how I was made. I was made to love music and performing, to enjoy words, and not just grammar! I was made special. And so were you. I promise the person you’re sitting next to you, or the child playing with your kid right now, is both better and worse at different things. That’s beautiful.

We are all made beautifully and wonderfully and each of our individual strengths are made to compliment and help each other. We were made like this so we would need each other. Unfortunately we as humans seem to want to put people into a box, we earnestly desire for things to all fit into to what we deem as normal.

Well let me blow your mind right now. NONE of us are normal, BUT all of us are special. I know, very cliché, but true.

So what are we, today; going to do to realize that we are made special. AND how are we going to show those around us they are made beautifully and just the way they should be?

We were made to watch movies.

We were made to watch movies. I live in Hollywood, arguably the most influential place in the world. In my opinion Hollywood and the film (and often music) industry is more powerful than any kind of government, military, press or person in the world. If you want proof look at the what we REALLY care about. For the  President's public address about the capture and killing of OBL (A historical landmark) ABC had 8.6 million viewers. But when the pilot of LOST premiered (A show no one had ever seen before) it had more than double with 18.6 million viewers.....wow......I think it is hard to ignore the facts about what we, as Americans,  and actually care about.

But why? Why would we rather watch made up stories about lost Islands and a crazy game show of love with a bachelorette than almost anything else? Why are we obsessed with stories?   This is the real question.

This is the answer. It's how we were made. I know, I know it's a cheap answer, but I think it's the truest one. I honestly think the reason the film industry is such an driving force is this: We were made to love stories and to have a grand part in a story. We were made to desire to be a part of a bigger story, an epoch. Stories change us and teach us, we learn best through stories and stories are what inspire and last and tell the history of who and what we are, and give us hope for what we could become. Just look at the most influential documents in history, The Bible, The Koran, The Little Red Book...ALL STORIES. And movies are just a beautiful new way to make stories visual. That, my friends, is why we have made going to the movies one of the most important things we do. We were pre-wired love stories and consequently, to go to movies.

But there in lies the danger. We have seen such amazingly terrible consequences occur when we allow the screen raise our children, teach our youth, and mold the ideas of us as people. We are letting a money-centered, fame-crazed empire inform, entertain, and teach us. So this is our problem. We are made to desire and be a part of something that has now become corrupt and robbing us of our money, all in one fell swoop.

ArrgggHHHH so what do we do?! Do we give up on the industry as a whole?

NO! I think rather we change it, we guide it, and we watch very carefully what we watch and let influence us, as we swim through the dangerous waters that are the movie industry with careful strokes, weighing everything thing we let speak to us or inform our hearts. But most of all. We support the good in the sea of bad. We recognize the lights in the dark, and we tell this industry that we like light and want to see more. And if all else fails, we make our own light.

So get out there, support the films and pieces of story that are worthy. Or better yet, make your own! And keep the tradition of good stories alive!

You aren't good enough. Take it from me.

You aren't good enough. That's it, that's pretty much all I have to say. But don't take it the wrong way, I like you, I really do. But I'll say it again, you aren't good enough. BUT...... Neither am I, and it's a good thing. Let me explain.

I go through these times where I think to know God-I, for some reason or another (I'm human)  think I have to somehow do things to please and know Him. I have to do all the right things (Once I gave up meat, and soft drinks...I know), not do bad things, and if I just keep that up, he'll seeing me being "good enough" doing all these "good" things and he'll be all like.

"Nathan way to go man! I totally love you now"

And I'll be all like.

"NIIIICE!!!! I knew if I did enough good things you'd notice me"

But I think I get it all wrong when I live with this mentality, I fool my self into thinking all God wants is for me to be good. And that's not to say God doesn't desire me to be holy. But I think my priority's are all out of wack! First and foremost God wants ME. Let that sink in He wants US just us! Not my or your good works, or lack of bad habits but just US!

The bible says "He has made us fearfully and wonderfully" and that he SO loved us he gave his life for us. Not the ones who deserved it (no one does) but just all of us. What is this saying? HE LOVES ME AND YOU, HE WANTS TO KNOW US. And while we get so caught up in trying to do the right thing, we either fail and feel like we aren't good enough to know him or be near him, or we end up giving up something silly and thinking we did it all on our own!

So what needs to happen? We need to stop worrying about being good, but worry about knowing God. I will most likely be the only Christian who will tell you this, but stop trying to be good, you're not and never will be, be bad and embrace the fact that you can't do anything about it, but be bad and run after knowing God with all your heart, the other stuff will follow. But FIRST just know him. He loves you and me so much, he doesn't even care where we have been what we have done. He knows everything about you,  He just wants us to know him.

So let's not wait until we think we are good enough to know God to get to know him, lets just let him love us right where we are, and he'll take care of the rest.

And gooooooodness that's a weight off.

He loves me and you. A lot...Get to know the one who made and loves you no matter what.

I'm so like. UGHGGGAAA. And the times like these.

I am not very good at waiting.... This is how I wait let me illustrate.

Okay I'm waiting........still waiting.............ummmm I guess I will STILL WAIT.................. uh hello?.............OH MY GOODNESS I" SO OVER WAITING...............................................

Or something like that the point is. I'm not very good at it. I don't know why I'm not good at waiting, it's just not how I was made. I get and fidgety, and restless, and then I frustrated. I get confused when I feel God gives me all these dreams and ideas and then he tells me to wait. And I'm so like. UGHGGGAAA

But I think it's in the URRRRRGAAAAA times that we are really molding what these dreams that God has given us will actually look like. It's not fun, or enjoyable and to be honest I don't always know why it's nessacery. But God knows, and I trust him with everything. So why it's not always fun I'm trusting that letting God have even the times I am waiting, and not just the awesome big HUZAH moments will make my dreams come true.

I hope some of this made since, because I am in a waiting time right now (somewhere in-between lunch and dinner) and I don't know how much since I am making. But hopefully you can find something that speaks to you.

I'm off to wait some more.

-Nathan

Lets Just Stop and Think.

I keep finding my self not finding myself. Let me rephrase. I think as people we have this beautiful and God-given desire to do. To make find and create, to continue on the never ending search for meaning. This is why we do things like google ourselves, or pick up hobbies that are really very silly, or even start a blog. We just have this undying desire to matter and to do something that's worth mattering.

But sometimes I feel as if on all this meaning hunting. I get lost in the activity of searching for meaning and forget what I am actually looking for. Weather it's work, meetings, money, friends. I get bogged down.

I think we all need to learn  stop the meaning search for a second, and breathe, and maybe in the time we take to rest and ask God to show us what we are going for in the first place.

So I am going to take my own advice, and leave you and go and...

Hello world

That's about all just saying hey.